7/25/2012 02:55:00 PM

The Week in Gordon Ramsay: Unedibly Disgusting Pudding and More

This summer is set to be the bloody rawest TV season ever, with Gordon Ramsay mainstays Hell's Kitchen and MasterChef each running twice a week and an upcoming new Gordo show, Hotel Hell. Each week we’ll recap all the chef's most outlandish moments, from plates thrown across the room to spittle and insults flying right into each contestant's eyes.

What do dozens of restaurants, a television production company and flaky golden locks of Zack Morris hair get you? The title of highest-earning chef in the world, according to Forbes Magazine. Gordon Ramsay’s $38 million in earnings puts him well ahead of runner-up Rachael Ray, who pulls in roughly $25 million, according to Forbes.

Despite its first-place ranking, the Ramsay food-tertainment empire continues to expand. Just two months after opening Gordon Ramsay Steak in Las Vegas, Gordo has set his sights on another of Sin City’s vacant spots; the former Ogden’s space in Caesar’s Palace is set to reopen as Gordon Ramsay Pub & Grill.

Rambo continues on his lifelong media tour in support of his television holdings. While chatting with television critics about the upcoming premiere of his new show, Hotel Hell, last week, Ramsay was asked if he could impart any wisdom gleaned from shooting the show. He gave some advice that is, just…gross. "If any of you are dating and go away for a long weekend like any couple would do, if you get there and they suggest they're going to upgrade you to the honeymoon suite, don't take it,” he said, according to Jean Bentley of the television news website, Zap2it. "[A blacklight] should be as crucial as leaving your home with your credit card," he continued.

Ramsay’s advice might be right, but then again, he has always come across as a bit squeamish around the unclean. Think of the shrill scream he lets out when presented with a raw slice of meat. He curses, he throws things, he’ll even call contestants names like muppet and moron. Deliver two raw dishes in a row, as Hell’s Kitchen contestant Robyn Almodovar did on Monday’s episode…“MADNESS!” A crimson-hued Gordon Ramsay declared. From that moment on, we knew Almodovar was headed for possible elimination, but who would join her on the chopping block? The obvious choice was contestant Kimmie Willis, the Memphis girl who couldn’t get a handle on fried catfish. At first Willis insisted that teammate Barbie Merel should have been sent packing instead. Merel was not pleased with the suggestion. “Oh no that heifer didn’t,” Merel said. Oh yes, she did. In the end, Ramsay was left with the choice of kicking out either Almodovar or Willis, the former friends turned bitter enemies. It was the final showdown between two of the greatest rivals we’ve seen since a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. And then, just like that, Gordo made the hardest decision of his life. He told Willis to leave. If Willis was an all-star, Tuesday’s victim of the Ramsay axe was anything but. Gordo has had it out for jokester contestant Brian Merel since Day 1.

The two men have had several confrontations about Merel’s zany behavior (and inconsistent cooking). The pressure of being in the final seven seemed to wear on Merel. Before Tuesday’s service, Ramsay presented a covered tray, which he said contained a surprise motivation for the remaining contestants. But before Ramsay could remove the cover, Merel had used his keen sense of smell to guess what Ramsay was about to unveil. “Mint,” he guessed. “It’s mint.” Ramsay shot him an angry look and said, “No.” Merel then guessed “cake.” Actually, there was nothing food-related at all on the tray. It was a black chef jacket, the traditional Hell’s Kitchen prize for being in the top six. Merel couldn’t make it through the dinner service and with a “Get out of here, bud,” Ramsay ended his run on Hell’s Kitchen.

I don’t know if Merel or Willis watch MasterChef, but if they do, they were probably pretty jealous when they saw the last six eliminated contestants return for Monday’s episode. The former contestants were given a chance to rejoin MasterChef. Former potential favorite Joshua Marks won easily, but the episode was all about the reappearance of villain Ryan Umane. On the show, about one in three lines uttered by Umane included his self-appointed dumb new nickname, “The Flavor Elevator.” And on Twitter, Umane acted like a mean girl when the camera showed contestant Monti Carlo seated alone at a table: “Monti is use to sitting at tables by herself  "#tableforone"  "#Masterchef", he tweeted. Umane also tweeted the link to a music video that he and fellow former contestant Tali Clavijo made during some sort of slumber party.

Umane didn't get a second shot at the MasterChef title, but contestant David Martinez basically did. It looked like Martinez's time on MasterChef was coming to an end when Judge Joe Bastianich gave the kind of rebuke of Martinez’s rice pudding that could make a strong man cry. “It’s really, really, really, unedibly disgusting. Did you taste this?” Bastianich asked. “I did. I enjoyed it. It reminded me of my mom’s kitchen,” Martinez replied. “That’s a place that I’m going to avoid,” Bastianich replied. SLAM! Lidia’s boy just knocked David’s mom OUT! Ms. Martinez totally deserved that, for sure. Despite the big time mom diss, it was Felix Fang who was ultimately kicked off for a dish that looked like "novelty cat" droppings, according to Judge Graham Elliot.


  1. Not accurate. David was not eliminated. It was Felix Fang that went. They sent David back to his station despite the bad dish.
    Get a clue and check your facts!!

  2. Thanks for pointing this out, we will correct!

  3. David should have been eliminated. It baffles the mind that he is still there.

  4. David defines the word BUFFOON. Amazing. Simply amazing.